Happy Valentine’s Day!
Since pawsdownlittlemonsters keeps comparing the MDNA tour to the Born This Way Ball and how its grossing more. Lets all take some time out and remember that Gagas second worldwide tour the Monster Ball out grossed 7 consecutive tours Madonna has been on.
The Monster Ball Tour ($227.4 million) VS :
- The Virgin Tour ($5 million)
- Who’s That Girl World Tour ($25 million)
- Blond Ambition World Tour ($60 million)
- The Girlie Show World Tour ($70 million)
- Drowned World Tour ($75 million)
- Re-Invention World Tour ($125 million)
- Confessions Tour ($194.7 million)
- The lead single from ARTPOP will be called Taste
- It will be released to radio in mid-December
- Gaga will formerly announce it by playing it at her show
- ARTPOP will have a second single in late January, and the album will come out by the end of February.
- I cannot release album art at this time. While I have them from a source I do not want to risk backlash from the photographer.
- A collaboration with Britney will appear on the album. As you know a theme on ARTPOP is the decay of the pop star, and Britney agreed to be apart of Gaga’s CD because of her influence on Gaga.
- That song is currently titled Bottled Blonde and will be about Princess Di, Marilyn Monroe and other famous blondes who died before their time.
- Bottle Blonde will have a vibe similar to Dance in the Dark, but more electronic pop - lighter feeling.
- That video will be the conclusion to the Paparazzi/Telephone trilogy, with Britney co-starring with Gaga.
- The tentative storyline for the video involves Gaga on the run from the police, getting help from Britney to change her appearance and identity. They begin to emulate the looks of famous blondes.
Read below for more news.
Some Gaga stans are really sweet and do their best to be nice to everyone. They revel in Gaga’s performance and appearances, and don’t necessarily pay attention to other performers.
Some Gaga stans like to talk shit about basic bitch pop stars that rip off Gaga or are just genuinely horrible (and here’s a little secret… when they shade your fave, it’s to be funny, they really don’t give a shit. At all).
And many are somewhere in the middle, criticizing other artists when it’s fair to do so, but for the most part being calm and reasonable.
When you hear all these different things said from Gaga stans, that when put side by side seem contradictory, they’re not actually coming from the same people.
The Little Monster saying “Bullying is for losers” isn’t the same Gaga fan that made a post calling Katy a cunt-wagon.
So you see, Madonna and Nicki stans who invade the #Lady Gaga tag, if you want to call out an individual for hypocritical behavior, be my guest. Go to their ask box, or reblog their post and call them out. Tell them their a hypocritical idiot.
But you can’t refer to the entertainment industries largest fanbase (a.k.a. us, not you) as collectively hypocritical. Because I don’t speak for anyone besides myself, and no one speaks for me.
Do you get it now?
The other day, or the other week, or fortnight, or whatever completely irrelevant measurement of time you want to imagine for this part of the post, I was dicking around in front of the local redbox, using the search function to look for hardcore gay erotica, as I usually do, when I came upon one of the rare cinematic triumphs of the decade I’m sure the critics will be clamoring over come award season.
I’m talking of course about ‘Katy Perry: Part of Me 3D.’
My visceral reaction to seeing it was to completely scroll over it, but after I calmed down and the burning sensation in my fingertips subsided, I figured it’d be interesting to learn more about the image Capitol records wants the public to believe/watch Katy try to hit a note that isn’t somewhere in the general area of a malfunctioning blade sharpener.
Just as a cautionary measure, let me make clear that my intention with this post is not to drag Katy, I am merely dissecting and deconstructing in an attempt to gain some understanding. If some spirited wig-pulling does occur, you’re just gonna have to roll with it. I’ll try to remain objective as best I can but there will more than likely be some noticeable underlying resentment. My stance while writing this is best summed up by this screencap of the audience in the film:
Me. I’m that guy.
As I’m sure you’ve surmised* (*big word practice because the SATs are coming up and we want to get into a good college!!) from the title of this post, the entire film revolves around you seeing millionaire, 7-time #1 single haver, 0-time Grammy award winner, Katy Perry, as a relatable, regular, normal, regular, ambitious, regular, hot, regular, REGULAR, REGULAR, REGULAR GIRL. The movie does all it can with this point until it’s finally been pounded into a fine snortable powder. Katy likes Taco Bell and Pizza and Chick-Fil-A and Kittens and tall promiscuous dirty-looking British comedians, just like any other teenage girl in the midwest. She likes singing songs she writes on her very own, and loves her brother and sister, and enjoys rebelling from her narrow-minded parents, and feigning homosexual tendencies to appeal to a wider demographic. Girly things!
Underground Dubstep DJ, Skrillex, makes a quick cameo to say some nice things about Katy.(or maybe it’s Cassie, there’s honestly no way to tell)
I’d like to mention more on the documentary aspect of the film, but that’s really all you need to know—and really—all the film is interested in you knowing. The selling point for a lot of drama-thirsty
queensmembers of the general public, Katy’s divorce to Russell Brand, is only given light in interspersed sobbing scenes which I find strange considering the narrative surrounding Katy beforehand.
Early in the movie, Katy reveals that listening to the revelatory lyrics of Alanis Morissette was the final push she needed to switch from gospel music to secular music, and throughout the movie they make a big-fuckin-to-do about how relentless her ambition is, and how very interested she is in standing out and pushing boundaries. This is all well and good, but a sentiment like that is almost COMPLETELY contradicted by just how much she chose to reveal and conceal in the film. A popular point of comparison among critics with movies like these, is Madonna’s ‘Truth or Dare’ documentary, and because I am a homosexual monkey with an internet connection, I also feel compelled to compare everything with a pulse, a functioning vagina, and a hairline, to Madonna.
I don’t have a point for this screencap, I just wanted to break up the monotony and I find him pleasant to look at. If only he weren’t the token gay at the Katy Perry concert. That’s how you know he’s a bottom :’(
In ‘Truth or Dare’ there’s also a big-fuckin-to-do made about Madonna’s relentless ambition, (the goddamn tour chronicled in the film is named after it) but Madonna allowed the audience to see everything, to the point where it did feel quite revelatory, even if there were scenes left on the cutting room floor (I’m still convinced she did more to that bottle at the end of the film than just suck it). The ambition seeps through. You can see it in her attitude and the way she carries herself, even when she’s most vulnerable. It’s there, and it’s almost intimidating that someone so famous at the time would willingly choose to reveal so much. I don’t want to say Katy Perry does a bastardized version of this because that would be rude, but I will imply it by saying that she does this ‘in lighter touches.’
We see her cry and sob and cry and get emotional and cry and by the end of it you do honestly sympathize with her, but you never really know why you sympathize with her heartbreak. Katy’s team assumes you’re going into the theater knowing enough about her life to fill in the holes, but the general public never really received any information about the break-up other than ‘irreconcilable differences.’ I’m not saying that Katy has an obligation to divulge to me or any other member of the viewing audience just how not bomb at all Russell Brand’s dick was, but if you’re going to bill a movie around being revealing and strong and construct a narrative about how ambitious, boundary-pushing, and ‘weird’ you are, I expect you to be on some Madonna-type shit (LADY GAGA DOES IT EVERY GODDAMN DAY). I want details as to why I should give a damn that you’re sad. What exactly made your marriage fall apart, other than your schedule and him just not being ‘the one.’ I’ve never seen a stan yell out for a fraction of fucking receipt.
But I guess I forget myself. Katy Perry isn’t targeting me. I’m not her demo, no matter how many songs she writes about how ok it is for me to enjoy making boys orgasm. Katy Perry and company are much more interested in the easily manipulable and profitable 9-12 crowd, and 9-12 year olds aren’t interested in iconography or securing a place in pop culture, they just want to know if it’s real whip cream Katy’s shooting from her d-cups and where they sell training bras that can do that.
One of the few points in the film that is grounded in reality, is the eventual product of Katy’s ambition: numbers. If you’ve ever been within 10 feet of a radio station, television, computer, laptop, snapback, ringback, or outback steakhouse, you’ll know damn well that Katy is the first artist since Michael Jackson to blah blah fuckity blah 40958 #1 singles blah etc etc. It’s an impressive feat to achieve, and although the movie dances around this a lot more effortlessly than I’m giving it credit for, it is her only feat. Whenever anyone mentions Katy Perry, even her most devoted stans automatically jump to her numbers. Not her proficiency as a song writer, not her performance ability, not her 5th grade talent show choreography, not her cultural impact. It’s always her numbers. Because numbers are the only way to level the playing field for an artist like Katy, whose many talents are just average at best, and even when combined, haven’t produced anything yet that has really shaken the foundation of pop culture like a Gaga or a Madonna.
I only make these comparisons because that’s exactly the position the film tries to place her in. Some sort of cultural magnate, who’s fostered change through her determination, when really, at the end of the day, it’s the numbers backing her up that justify making a movie like this, not her impact.
I would mention the several performances that take place throughout the film but I don’t really see why I should. They’re visually pleasing but even the concert is not the centerpiece of the concert film. I guess that’s fine though, most American audiences don’t have a large enough frame of reference to determine what a good performance even is. I could dangle a tomato on a string onstage for 3 minutes and as long as it had a microphone attached to it and a backing track produced by Dr. Max Lucas Redone da Don, people would eat that shit up and it’d have a number 1 single in 24 hours and I’d have to write another one of these damn things for its concert movie.
What the fuck ever, man.
follow this fucking blog.